


The fallen men of Edo

by Erimori



Category: Gintama
Genre: Comedy, Drama, Fluff, Heavy Angst, Helpless GIntoki, M/M, Meninyukata, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Overprotective Hijikata, Semi-Alternative Universe, Sexual Content, Tragic Romance, Uke Gintoki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-03-02
Packaged: 2018-05-16 20:32:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5840017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erimori/pseuds/Erimori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hijikata is struggling with an identity crisis as he helplessly watches the Shinsengumi dissolve before his eyes. With his existence stripped of purpose, he decides to end his life. This is when a silver haired man gets in the way – a simpleton that has lost all his memories.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> In this story Hijikata and Gintoki have never met before.  
> A lot of things I describe might not match with the real universe, since I've only reached the second season of the anime, so the univese will be semi-alternative. I hope you'll enjoy. :)

Hijikata felt a throbbing pain in the back of his head as he slowly tried to push himself up from the wet ground, but to his dismay the hands failed to give him support, his body collapsing with face buried deep into the mud. Chaos was surrounding him- desperate cries, pitiful screams and colliding swords drowning out the peaceful sound of rain. _I need to do something, but my body won’t move,_ Hijikata attempted to get up again, but his body rejected his request, demanding to take a rest for the first time in several years. “Damn it,” Hijikata cursed, digging his nails down in the mud. In the far distant he could hear a familiar voice calling out. “Hijikata! I’m coming!”

“Yamazaki? Thank god you’re here,” Hijikata was relieved as Yamazaki kneeled down beside him. “I can’t move my body.”

Yamazaki grabbed him by the arm. “Here, let me help you-“ he never got to finish his line as he suddenly fell on top of Hijikata, pushing Hijikata if possible further down in the dirt.

“Hey, you’re crushing me, get off,” Hijikata was pissed. “Hey!”

Hijikata was then silenced as he felt a wet substance running down the side of his face and dripping down on his hand. Blood. Yamazaki’s blood. It only took one second for Hijikata to figure out the situation – if there was something his days in the Shinsengumi had taught him, it was to think fast. Although he couldn’t see him, he knew that there was an opponent hovering above him at this very moment. Hijikata raised his face slightly from the ground and registered Yamazaki’s sword lying about an arm’s length away from him. If only his hands would move. He then suddenly got an idea and grabbed tightly around Yamazaki’s arms. He barely made it in time before the enemy grabbed Yamazaki by the leg and yanked it in an attempt to get through to Hijikata. The plan turned out just as Hijikata wanted; as Yamazaki was flipped around, Hijikata was now lying on top of Yamazaki, finally getting a glance of the person who had just killed his friend. An amanto, of course. A devilish looking one.

“Your biggest mistake was to let me see your ugly face,” Hijikata’s leg lashed out, crushing the knee cap of the devil with one kick. He then crawled over and reached out for Yamazaki’s sword. “I will revenge you, my friend,” he whispered.

However, revenge was not as sweet as Hijikata had imagined, feeling no thrill as he pulled the sword out from the devil’s bleeding chest, watching its eyes turning expressionless. Taking a life could no longer be excused as being a part of his job- from now on, this kind of action would classify him as a heartless killer. Hijikata managed to get up on his feet, groaning as he felt his entire body silently screaming in pain. With great effort he stumbled towards Yamazaki and squatted down next to the lifeless body swimming in a pool of blood, his hands slightly trembling as he closed Yamazaki’s eyes for good. “We did what we could, Yamazaki, but in the end there’s no dignity in dying,” Hijikata said, tears running down his face, washed away by the pouring rain. Hijikata looked up at the grey sky, dark clouds and warships floating above him, the blue sky that once hovered above Edo long lost.

“Kondou is down!” he heard somebody scream from afar. Hijikata’s eyes widened in disbelief, his shoulders starting to tremble as he burst out in laughter, the tears now blurring his vision.

“I see,” he said as he got past his moment of madness, the grip around the shaft tightening. “So this is how it will eventually end. I’ll see you both on the other side.”

Hijikata got on his knees and raised the sword, the edge pointing towards his own chest as he let his eyelids drop. All those times he had barely escaped death, and now he was about to die by his own hands. What a joke. Was life playing pranks on him?

Hijikata’s eyes snapped open as he heard something right behind him. Footsteps. _Can’t I even die in peace?_ Out of poor instinct, Hijikata swung around, his sword tearing through fabric, blood splashing as a body heavily dropped to the ground. Hijikata looked down at his attacker and hissed dreadfully as he found a silver haired man in civilian clothes, completely unarmed and bare footed. “Hey, are you alright,” Hijikata cursed, bending down and pressing his hands against the wound to stop the blood. The wounded man looked up at Hijikata with distant eyes, only to close them and drift off to unconsciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hijikata is struggling with an identity crisis as he helplessly watches the Shinsengumi dissolve before his eyes. With his existence stripped of purpose, he decides to end his life. This is when a silver haired man gets in the way – a simpleton that has lost his memories.

The motel owner was hesitant to let Hijikata stay the night when he showed up with a half-dead man hanging around the shoulders. “I don’t shelter you Bakufu dogs,” she declined with crossed arms, taking notice of his uniform.

“Do you want this innocent person to die?” Hijikata asked, the question softening the harsh features in her face. With a huff she stepped aside so he could get inside.

“Follow me,” she said, leading him through a narrow corridor with countless doors on each side, a dim light casting shadows on the walls as they moved. The place seemed lively, people’s voices coming from inside the rooms.

“The only vacant room is a special one, so you’d better afford it,” she said with a rather strict voice before pushing the door at the very end of the corridor open. Hijikata nearly dropped the man and his own jaw on the floor as he got a glance of the room, a big double bed with rose petals spread all over it.

“What the hell is this?” he couldn’t help but shout out.

“I told you it was a special room – and it’s the only one that has a separate bathroom,” the woman was annoyed, whispering ‘unthankful bastard’ to herself. “This room is usually reserved for couples that come here to spend their honeymoon. You’re lucky that the couple that was supposed to stay here tonight decided to cancel earlier this morning. Ma, young people nowadays give up so easily, just the tiniest problem and they can’t take it.”

“Ha, rumours about your horrific taste in room decoration has probably scared them off,” Hijikata snickered, losing breath as the woman grabbed his collar and yanked him close.

“What did you say?” she roared with a dark aura surrounding her. Hijikata uttered an apology and gasped for air and she let go.

“Wait here, I’ll come with towels,” the woman told him.

“Can you bring a futon as well?” Hijikata requested, stepping back in fear as she sent him an evil glare across the room.

“Do you think this is a luxury hotel,” she snapped before walking off. Hijikata walked up to the bed and swept some of the petals off the sheets before placing the man down on the bed. Hijikata’s sore shoulders suddenly felt light as a feather- as if his body wasn’t hurting enough already – having to carry a person for hours in the rain had surely not helped.

The owner came back and left some things on the table next to the door. “Here are some towels and some bandage for the wound. Also, I brought some clothes – I don’t want anybody to know that I’m housing a Bafuku dog,” she said. “Come down for supper in one hour.”

“What about the futon?” Hijikata asked. The woman sent him another one of those glares before slamming the door shut. Hijikata shrugged before getting out of his wet attire. There was a navy and a light grey yukata folded on the table. Hijikata put on the darker one and then walked over to the bed with the remaining stuff. The man looked so pale that he could go for being dead, but if one listened carefully, there was a sound of breathing. Hijikata kneeled down and started to undress the other, noticing how the man’s white, yet bloody, kimono almost blended with his silver hair.

Hijikata let out a disgusted groan as the wound was revealed, looking purple and inflammatory. Hijikata pushed a hand beneath the man’s back to get his upper body free from the bed in order to wrap the bandage around the wound. He tightened it with a double knot and let the man sink down to the bed yet again. “Heck, am I your caretaker?” Hijikata sighed heavily as he remembered the yukata. Getting a lifeless body dressed turned out to be a much bigger challenge than undressing it.

“Damn it,” Hijikata complained, fumbling to get the stiff arm through the sleeve. “Wha-“

Hijikata was taken by surprise as the man suddenly tugged his arm back, making Hijikata lose his balance and tip forwards. He almost fell on top of the other man, arms shooting out to avoid the fall, his face only a few inches away from the other. _What a beautiful man_ , was the first thing that popped up in Hijikata’s mind as he observed the man sleep with a peaceful expression and pouty lips slightly parted. Hijikata quickly dismissed his thought and got up from the bed. _Maybe I should go wash myself before supper_ , he decided and walked to the bathroom with the towel.

“REALLY?” he face palmed as he found a bathtub filled with rose petals.

-

“Who would have known that a Bafuku dog like you could look so great in a yukata,” the owner laughed behind the counter as Hijikata showed up at the lobby that looked more like a bar than a place where people would come and eat.

“Old lady, you’re so loud,” Hijikata grunted as he took a seat behind the counter. “Weren’t you the one wanting to hide my identity? Then stop calling me that already.”

“Right, right,” she said and handed him a bowl with only rice in it.

“So stingy, old lady,” Hijikata shook his head but went for it anyways. He hadn’t been eating the entire day – in a time of war there was no time to fulfil ones physical needs. His heart suddenly sank as he was reminded about the friends that he had lost today.

“For a person who hasn’t paid a deposit, you surely complains a lot,” the owner rolled her eyes. “And don’t call me old lady. My name is Otose.”

Otose noticed the sudden change of mood, how the young man went silent with his eyes dropping. “Here,” she said, sliding a glass across the counter. Hijikata looked at it before turning his eyes to Otose.

“What is it?” he wanted to know.

“It’ll make you feel better, I promise.”

-

Close to midnight Hijikata decided to head back to his room. His feet were unsteady, everything blurred out before him. Otose was right. He felt much better. The room was pitch black as he closed the door behind him, the light from the corridor shut out. He tried to find his way to the heap of clothes on the floor that he had left earlier that day – also called a replacement of a futon. _Where is it? Fuck it, the bed is big enough for both os us._

-

Hijikata’s head was spinning as he felt his body slowly waking up. Hangovers rarely hit him – but this one was a particular killer. He didn’t want to wake up, wanted to stay like this forever, the feeling of skin against skin too comfortable, something that he hadn’t done for so long. What? Hijikata forced his eyes open and fell off from the bed as he found his arms wrapped around a silver haired man’s body. What the hell? How did he end up on the bed?

His heart nearly jumped out of his chest as the other man made a sound and turned on his side so that Hijikata could get a glance of his face. His eyes then slowly opened, an empty expression in his eyes.

“You’re finally awake,” Hijikata was relieved that he hadn’t killed him for good. He got up on his feet and started to put on his yukata. That’s when the man on the bed started to talk, his voice sounding like a confused kid’s.

“Who are you?”

“I should be the one asking you that question,” Hijikata hissed as he tightened the rope around his waist. He was still angry that the stranger had interfered with his suicide attempt. “Who the hell are you?”

“… I don’t know,” the man replied after some time of thinking.


	3. Chapter 3

Hijikata took a long drag from his cigarette, completely ignoring the man next to him who was seized by a fit of coughing, the smoke too heavy for him to handle. “How many are you going to finish?” the silver haired man asked with a choking voice as Hijikata reached out for the fifth cigarette since they had come out on the veranda in front of Otose’s motel.

“Shut up, it’s non of your business,” Hijikata growled. Cigarettes were his best friends in times of reflection, and right now there was a damn lot to think about. _Should I just leave him out here on the streets? But he has completely lost his memories, so I should at least wait until his wound has healed completely. No, it’s the idiot’s own fault for sneaking up behind me, and he’s fine now, so just hurry up and throw him off your shoulders._

Hijikata was dragged out from his thoughts as the other man suddenly got up on his feet and started to chase a butterfly, his steps short and heavy since his body wouldn’t allow it to move faster. _He has totally lost his senses, if he ever had any_ , Hijikata wondered as he observed how the other man’s face expressed pure happiness just as he managed to get close to the flying insect. _Damn, he’s such a child, he would die out here by himself._

By the time that Hijikata had finished all his cigarettes and looked up from his lap, the other man was nowhere to be seen. This made Hijikata feel slightly annoyed; how could the guy be so careless when his body was in that kind of state? “Have you seen a silver haired man?” Hijikata asked the first person he met on the road.

“Yeah, I think I saw him in the park over there,” a stranger pointed in the right direction. It only took Hijikata a few minutes to reach the park, surrounded by a row of trees and bushes so that nobody could peek inside. To have a look one had to get inside the park through the main entrance. Hijikata was not surprised to hear children’s laugher as he rounded the corner of the park; after all the weather was awfully pleasant, neither sharp or dim. As Hijikata finally stepped inside the park, he could almost not believe his own eyes. A bunch of kids were surrounding a target that was lying crumbled down on the ground, helplessly covering his head as they hit him with sticks and spat down on him. “Idiot, idiot, who plays with insects your age,” a boy mocked as he stepped into the circle, signalling to his friends that he was the alpha. As he raised the stick to the air, he suddenly let out a sound of pain as his hand was yanked back, the force so powerful that he flied about two metres through the air before falling on hiss butt.

“My, my, have your parents not taught you anything?” Hijikata was hovering above the bully with a stern look, hitting the palm of his hand with the stick that was stolen from the boy. All the kids let out screams of horror and ran off, leaving behind their friend who was paralyzed by Hijikata’s terrifying presence. Just as Hijikata was about to do god knows what to the kid, two arms reached out from behind and held his arm in place. Hijikata turned around and looked down at the silver haired kneeling before him with face full of dirt and scratches. _How pathetic_ , Hijikata hated weak men more than anything.

“Stop,” the other begged. “No more…”

“Get up,” Hijikata offered a hand, waiting for the other to take it. What he didn’t expect, however, was that the other clung to it the rest of the way back to the motel.

“What kind of person are you!” Hijikata hissed as they walked, the other man’s grasp around his hand so tight that he felt it go numb. “They were not a day over ten.”

“I’m sorry, don’t be angry,” the other man said apologetically. “I’m sorry…”

When they returned to the motel the other man was so exhausted that he immediately fell asleep the moment he touched the bed. Hijikata took the blanket and covered him with it. _He looks like a completely normal person when he’s asleep_ , Hijikata reached down and pushed the wavy bangs away from the other’s face, amazed at how handsome the other looked up close. _I wonder what’s your story._

“So what do you plan to do with him?” Otose asked as Hijikata came down to the lobby. Hijikata let out a deep sigh and ran his hand through the hair in frustration.

“I got no clue,” he admitted. “The guy is practically a kid. He won’t last a day without somebody looking out for him. Should I announce him as a missing person?”

Otose shrugged. “Well, I don’t think it’s very wise to do that, seeing that we’re in a time of war. Human capital is the most demanded good right now – with that naïve mind of his, people will just try to take advantage of it. He would get into trouble in no time.”

Hijikata agreed. For the first time he had heard Otose saying something wise and suitable for her age. “So what do you suggest?”

Otose cleared her throat. “Well, I heard that there’s a male escort company not too far away from here who would gladly let a beautiful man as him join their adventures. I hear they get good taken care of and that the pay is much better than normal esc-“

“What the fuck is wrong is wrong with you?” Hijikata roared out and face palmed, regretting the kind thoughts that he had silently sent her a few seconds back.

-

_That night Hijikata had a terrible dream – he was at the cemetery, mourning with Yamazaki’s family members when a hand all of sudden shot up from the ground, grabbing him by the ankle and dragging him down to the open grave. “Hijikata, it’s your fault that I died, so now I will take you down with me.” No matter how hard Hijikata tried to avoid being pulled down, hands grasping for something to hold onto, he kept moving downwards into the deep black hold, an endless fall as Yamazaki’s laughter filled his ears. “Stop! Stop!” Hijikata begged for mercy, but Yamazaki would just continue laughing. “We’ll go down together, didn’t you say that once, Hijikata?” “Yes, join us,” Kondou appeared in front of him, blood running down the corners of his eyes. “I’ve been waiting for you.”_

Hijikata’s eyes opened wide as he woke up from his nightmare, body soaking from sweat and a beating heart. _What_ , he was puzzled as he felt the silver haired man straddling him, warm lips pressed gently against his. Hijikata immediately pushed the other man’s face away. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?” he snapped.

“You were crying in your sleep, so I thought I would stop it,” the other simply answered, the room too dark for Hijikata to read his face. Earlier that day when they were sitting at the veranda, a fighting couple was walking by, the woman so angry over something that her boyfriend had done. When she burst out in tears, he had pulled her into his arms and kissed her, the tears immediately vanishing.

“You have got to be kidding me,” Hijikata said in disbelief.

“But it stopped, your tears,” the other man said and got off from Hijikata and went up to the bed again. “So now I can sleep again. Goodnight.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hijikata is struggling with an identity crisis as he helplessly watches the Shinsengumi dissolve before his eyes. With his existence stripped of purpose, he decides to end his life. This is when a silver haired man gets in the way – a simpleton that has lost his memories.

Hijikata yawned as he pushed himself up in a sitting position, his bag sore from sleeping on the floor. When he looked up to the bed he found it unexpectedly empty. _He’s probably embarrassed about the thing he did to me last night_ , Hijikata was certain, _one second he chases butterflies and the next he goes kissing a complete stranger. I really don’t know what’s inside that simple head of his._

There was a sudden sound of crumbling paper as Hijikata tried to get up from the heap of clothes that had served as his nest. The sound came from the other man’s blood stained kimono that Hijikata had used to keep his feet warm at night. _Oh, what is this_ , Hijikata pulled a folded piece of paper out from beneath the kimono. A handwritten letter. A furrow appeared on Hijikata’s forehead as he tried to decode the blurred out scribbles, but the writer of the letter had a rather terrible handwriting.

_[Hi Ki…..(the rest is blurred out)_

_The universe is so fascinating. I sincerely hope that you will reconsider my offer and come join me. There’s nothing left in Edo to hold you back. I’ll be waiting for your reply._

_Sakamoto.]_

-

“You surely slept well,” Otose said sarcastically from behind the counter as Hijikata approached her. The lobby was awfully crowded, a hectic atmosphere as people around them were chatting while eating lunch.

“Oh, it’s already this late,” Hijikata glanced at the watch on the wall – it was already 1pm. He couldn’t remember the last time he had slept this long. Now his body felt surprisingly refreshed but also a tad lazy at the same time. “By the way, you know where the fool went?”

Before Otose managed to answer him, he got his answer as the other man suddenly appeared from the room behind the counter, balancing with a tray filled with plates of food. He looked totally transformed; it was evident that he had been washing himself, his face clear from dirt, his hair no longer identical with a bird’s nest, his posture less clumsy. “Good morning, Hijikata,” he smiled brightly at Hijikata and walked over to a table where three girls were sitting. He was wearing a white yukata, which matched his complexion perfectly.

Otose laughed as she saw how surprised Hijikata looked. “Your fool actually woke up pretty early and asked me if I could need a helping hand. It seems like the customers love him – most of those girls over there aren’t even checked in here, but they still came in to eat after they saw him sweeping the floor outside the motel.”

“I see,” Hijikata nodded, observing how the other man innocently laughed as one of the girls leaned in and said something to him. “Oh right, old lady, do you by chance know a Sakamoto?”

Otose raised a brow. “Sakamoto? That’s a very common name – why do you ask?”

“I found this,” Hijikata handed Otose the letter.

“This could be anyone, man or woman,” Otose let out a heavy sigh after reading the letter. “The person could at least have left a first name. I don’t think this letter will be of much help. Mah, at least we now know half of his name.”

“You’re doing a great job,” Otose praised as the silver haired man came back behind the counter with an empty tray. “I can’t believe that you were a total noob this morning, but now I can’t even tell my own dishes from yours.”

“Oh, thanks,” again that bright smile across his face. Somehow it annoyed the heck out of Hijikata.

“Hey, I saved your life, so how about showing some gratitude and make me some food too,” Hijikata grunted at him. Normally people would get angry by being bossed around, but the other man simply smiled at Hijikata.

“Yes, just a second,” he asked him to wait and disappeared into the backroom again.

“Don’t you think that was a little over the top?” Otose raised a brow.

Hijikata removed the dirt from his ear. “Who cares, the idiot is too stupid to catch on.”

The other man was back in no time, placing a plate with omelette rice before Hijikata. “Here you go,” he hummed cheerfully, lingering by the desk as Hijikata took a bite. “How is it?”

“Tastes good,” Hijikata couldn’t help but be honest, starting to dig in.

The other man smiled for the thousandth time. “I’m glad that you like it, Hijikata.”

 _What’s with the calling out my name all the time,_ Hijikata thought to himself as the other went to serve the other guests. _He’s not even ashamed of what he did last night…_

-

The sun was starting to set as Hijikata sat on the veranda, a cigarette in his hand as he watched the other man sweep the floors before him. “Hey, you,” Hijikata called out.

“Yes?” the other stopped sweeping and walked up to Hijikata. The orange rays of sun hit his face, brightening up his maroon coloured eyes. He looked absolutely stunning.

“From now on, I will call you Kin,” Hijikata announced casually.

Kin pointed at himself, a warm smile emerging on his face. He looked like someone who had just received a gift. “Kin? I like it. I like how it sounds when you say it.”

Oddly, his words made Hijikata’s heart skip a beat, his face suddenly turning uncomfortably hot. “You,” Hijikata hid his face in the palm of his hand and looked away. “You really have no clue, do you?”

“No clue about what?” Kin tilted his head, confusion in his voice.

Hijikata let out a heavy sigh and spoke his mind. “Kissing a man while he’s asleep, that’s not normal.”

“That’s because you were crying,” Kin defended his previous actions, no trait of regret in his voice. “I don’t want to see you sad. Seeing you sad makes me sad as well.”

Hijikata laughed into his palm, the other’s cheesiness too much to handle. “You saying this are making me cry right now on the inside, although you can’t see it.”

“… Is that so?”

Before Hijikata knew it, Kin was kneeling down before him, a hand reaching out, gently pulling Hijikata’s hand away from the face. As Hijikata turned his face to look at Kin, his eyes widened in shock as hot lips were pressed against his. This time, Hijikata didn’t push the other way, his body completely paralyzed.

Kin pulled back from the kiss after some seconds, studying Hijikata’s face with an unreadable expression. “Are you still crying?”

 _Damn it_ , Hijikata cursed at himself as he grabbed the other man’s arm and pulled him close. He then captured the other man’s lips with his, forcing the other man’s lips apart with his tongue and started to kiss the other intensely. He felt how the other man tried to struggle, a failing attempt to push him away as he explored the other’s mouth. Kin was catching his breath, wiping his wet lips as Hijikata finally let go of him. “What are you doing?” he was confused, his face flushing.

“You should know the consequences of your actions before you go tempting me,” Hijikata got up on his feet and walked off. _Damn it._

“Hijikata!“ the other man called out, but Hijikata didn’t turn around.


	5. Chapter 5

The inn owner was more than wiling to lash drinks across the counter, very much in contrast to Otose who kept nagging whenever he wanted to drink more than three beers. Hijikata glanced outside – it had already turned dark, making him wonder how many hours he had been seated here. _Should I go back_ , Hijikata dismissed the idea. “Another one, please!” he called out. The bell hanging by the door made a sound when a new customer entered. The newly arrived sat down on the chair next to Hijikata’s, long pitch black hair, his face hidden away by the massive straw hat that he was wearing. 

“Can I have a cup of green tea?” the man’s voice sounded so familiar that Hijikata instantly reached out and pulled the hat back so that he could get a look of his face.

“Katsura the theorist!” Hijikata shouted out with a finger pointing at Katsura. Katsura let out a heavy sigh while removing his hat completely, placing it on the counter.

“It’s Katsura. And judging from the circumstances, you and I are now on the same boat, so there is really no need to point fingers,” he said, referring to the Shisengumi’s fall.

“Here you go,” the inn lady placed two beers in front of them.

  
“I asked for a cup of tea,” Katsura protested with a displeased face and pushed the beer towards the lady. 

“Does this place look like a tea party to you?” the lady shouted, making Hijikata chuckle. Apparently all inn owners had angry issues. Hijikata stopped laughing when he noticed Katsura’s eyes staring at him with an odd expression.

  
“What is it?” Hijikata asked. “Why are you staring at me?”

“I don’t think I have ever seen you laugh,” Katsura said. “Maybe the war has loosened you up.”

“More likely the beer,” Hijikata scoffed and handed Katsura a beer. “Come on, theorist, drink with me. I promise that I will not attempt to kill you tonight.”

-

“So what brings you here?” Hijikata asked. Not in his wildest dreams had he imagined him and this person sitting down and having a cozy chat like this. When pushing their ideologies aside, Hijikata and Katsura were actually able to lead a casual conversation. “I mean, you don’t drink, so why would you come here?”

Katsura took a sip from his cup of tea and cleared his throat. “I’m actually looking for a friend. We were in a battle on the North side about a month ago when he suddenly disappeared. He usually liked to hang out at places like this, so I thought I might find him here.”

Hijikata had heard about the battle on the North side, it being the bloodiest encounter this year, thousands of people losing their lives, among these several civilians. “And why would you think that he is still alive?” Hijikata wanted to know – the amount of dead bodies had been so high that they had to burn them in heaps. It had been all over the news, family members of the decreased crying out, not being given the opportunity to bury their beloved ones.

Katsura smiled, looking confident as his thoughts was drawn to his missing friend. “I know him. He’s a tough one, a simple battle can’t kill him. I wonder if you might have met him. He has silver hair, an excellent swordsman with eyes of a dead fish."

“Does such a person even exist?” Hijikata said in disbelief and finished his beer. “It’s time for me to go back. See you, Katsura the theorist.”

  
“It’s Katsura.”

-

‘Did I overdo it?” Hijikata regret that he had been drinking so much, his head throbbing like crazy. He was glad that he was almost back to Otose’s motel. He could now see it from afar, the light in the windows lightening up the dark sky. When Hijikata reached the motel, Otose came out on the veranda. “Oh, you came back alone?” she asked. In that instant the rain suddenly started to pour down 

“Alone? What do you mean?”

“Kin went after you ages ago, a short while after you left. He hasn’t come back. Hey! Hey! Where are you going?” Otose shouted out as Hijikata ran off in the rain. “Geez… at least bring an umbrella…” 

After spending almost an hour in the pouring rain with no sign of the silver haired man, Hijikata started to panic, guilt filling him inside out as he memorized their departure, Kin’s voice begging him to stay. He could no longer feel the alcohol in his body, his mind clear. “Ah!” two kids ran past him with their hands covering their heads. “Hurry up! I’m all soaked!” one of them yelped.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t help that guy out?” the other said, voice worried.

“No, he’s an adult, he can take care of himself…” one of them suddenly gasped as Hijikata grabbed his arm, forcing him to stop in his tracks.

  
“Where is he?”

-

Hijikata rounded the corner, and just as the boy had told, he was facing a blind alley filled with trash, a shadow resting against the wall in the darkness. Hijikata stepped closer and could now finally get a glance of the other man; Kin was sitting with his knees pulled up close, arms embracing them as he rested his head on the backside of his hands. His shoulders were trembling, his clothes and hair all drenched. “You fool, what are you doing here?” Hijikata tried to sound harsh, but it turned out much gentler than he had intended to.

Kin’s head snapped up, vulnerable eyes looking up at Hijikata. “Hijikata! I thought you had left me. Please don’t be angry with me.”

Hijikata kneeled down before the other man and placed a hand on Kin’s shoulder. “I’m not angry.” 

His words made Kin’s lip turn up in a half smile. “That’s good. That’s good,” he was relieved as he rested his head against Hijikata’s chest. “I don’t know what I would do if you start hating me.”

Hijikata let his hand run through Kin’s hair. “Fool. Don’t assume things.”

  
“Are you alright?” Hijikata asked when he didn’t get a response. He then lifted Hijikata up in his arms and started to head back to the motel. Gin’s face looked so peaceful with his eye closed, not a sign of worry in his sleep. 

-

“Kin, you need to wake up,” Hijikata said with a soothing voice. Kin slowly opened his eyes and found himself naked in a bathtub, Hijikata’s arm resting against the wall of the tub. “You need to wash the rain off, otherwise you’ll become sick.”

Kin let out a startled sound as Hijikata turned on the water, slowly filling the tub up. “Cold,” he whined.

“It’s getting hot in a few seconds,” Hijikata assured.

“Hijikata, you need to wash up too,” Kin reached out and started to tug in Hijikata’s yukata.  
  
“I’ll do it when you finish, so hurry up,” Hijikata said and handed Kin the soap.

“No, the water will become cold then,” Kin protested – he sounded so determined that the inner child in him had seemed to vanish. Hijikata let out a sigh and got up on his feet.

  
“Very well,” he sounded like a defeated man as he slowly removed himself from the wet robes, revealing his skin. The water was splashing as Hijikata stepped into the bathtub. There was barely place for two grownups in it.

“Let me wash your back,” Kin offered. Hijikata turned around so that his back was now exposed to the other. He couldn’t help but shiver when Kin’s warm hands suddenly started to rub his back.

“Why didn’t you go back to the motel when it started to rain?” Hijikata asked.

“I wanted to, but I got lost,” the other explained. _No, he’s still a child._


End file.
